Children and Loss
Talking about death can be uncomfortable for parents. It is important, though, to create an environment in which your children feel safe asking questions and expressing their feelings. There are different factors that affect how a child responds to a given death. These include:
- The relationship with the person who has died
- Previous death experiences
- The child’s ability to express emotions
- The child’s age and developmental level
* Security is very important. A child may want to be closer to mom or dad and might have difficulty separating from them.
* He/She may worry who will die next and who will take care of them if others die.
* The child may desire details about the death.
* There is concern with how others are responding and wondering what is the "right" way to respond.
Children might be confused about how they are supposed to act and feel. Reassure your child that however he/she is feeling, it is okay.
There is no right or wrong way to feel.
Other Points
- Children grieve differently then adults. They tend to believe it won’t happen to them or anyone they know.
- If a child is old enough to love, the child is old enough to grieve.
- Avoiding grief is unhealthy.
- A child’s feelings of sadness are likely to occur on and off over a long period of time and at unexpected moments.
- Children need permission to show his feelings openly and freely. Talk about it!
- Be aware that birthdays, anniversaries and holidays can be especially difficult.
- As children grow developmentally, their grief can change and impact them in a new way.
- They might experience the loss all over again in a new way.
Dealing With Family Loss Around The Holidays
Books
- Lifetimes by Bryan Mellonie Page
- The Invisible String by Patrice Karst
- The Fall of Freddie the Leaf by Leo Buscagla
- Someone Special Dies by Joan Prestine
- I Miss You: A First Look at Death by Pat Thomas
- When Dinosaurs Die by Laurie Kransy Brown
- When Someone Special Dies by Marge Heegaard
- Why Did You Die? by Ellen Goldring
- Cornerstone of Hope (Support groups, camps and counseling) www.cornerstoneofhope.org 825-4285
- Evergreen Program through Mount Carmel (Support for the whole family) 234-0200
- Stepping sSStones through Kobacker House (Support groups for children with adults meeting separately) 566-5377
- Pregnancy and Infant Loss Support Group through Kobacker House 566-5377
- Camp Kesem (Camp for children who have/have had a parent with cancer) [email protected]
- OhioHealth Grief Services - (614) 566.5377 https://www.ohiohealth.com › Support